This is about a show from the first German season of “The Next Uri Geller” from early 2008. You can also:
» Show all my reports from the first season.
» Show everything about the second season 2009.
» Show really all articles about Uri Geller.
(Note: If anyone knows good English sites, please let me know.)
- Uri Geller was guest in last week’s Welt and RP. Oliver Pocher as “Morta Deller” poked quite some fun at the “mystic” magic tricks, and while Geller played along – e.g. with the typical overly enthusiastic summary –, according to his facial expression, he seemed anything but enthused… Well, main thing is to be present and talked about, he knows from years ago that even bad PR is good PR.
The entire performance can be seen here on YouTube. And here’s the end credits which some see as Geller going ballistic.
– reports (German), among others, at
- The Dodo of the Month January 2008, award for brainwashing of the people, went to ProSieben for “The Next Uri Geller”.
- And again, I’d like to mention my article titled “Magic?” with some arguments and thoughs on magic, paranormal abilities, rational explanations and dangers of too uncritical thinkung…
As always, in general: These are all tricks, no supernatural powers! And we’ll see how good and entertaining today’s tricks are… today, all six who are left in this mentalist race perform, and thus the show is planned to last two and a half hour (including commercials).
The show starts with a warning board:
Translated: WARNING! Several live experiments of the following show are LIFE THREATENING! Only professional mentalists can execute these experiments.
NEVER TRY THIS AT HOME!
Life threat or no – calling the magic tricks “experiments” is ridiculous, though unfortunately fits in the scheme ProSieben and Geller are using in this show.
Loki and Helmut Schmidt had been reported smoking this week (no wonder) – and they have reserved two seats for them, with Geller promising that if they come, he’d guarantee to make them stop smoking. Uri raves about the many “normal” people that thanked him for their smokelessness.
The most frequently asked question is passed along: “Uri Geller, do you have supernatural powers?” – Answer: “Stephan, of course I have no supernatural powers”, plus an extreme wink in his eye. Meh. “Solved once and for all”? As if! Better had done without that rubbish.
And I hope I never need the help of the three chief physicians who attend the show to pretend credibility – called “the incorruptibles” by ProSieben. Ha! If the invitation to appear on TV and sit almost in the front is no bribe, then what is?
New: After each performance, the viewers can vote (for 2 minutes).
Contestant 1: David Goldrake
This will be sharp: “Survivor” David Goldrake wants to dare a fascinating statement: “For this, I need especially one thing: a clean-ground dagger”, he says.
Really a fascinating statement in this.
Today, he says, he wants to let his soul speak, by bundling his thoughts to safely hit his target. To start, he shows a pack of cards with the
great banal parallels to the calendar (4 colors/seasons, 52 cards/weeks, added values = 364, plus joker, blabla); an “incorruptible” doctor, Prof. Dr. med. Gerd P. Molter, may pick a pack of cards out of a bucket full of packs, open, check, shuffle; the three celebs are asked to enter the stage too.
David browses through, doc and celebs each say stop, he shows them (and the camera) the card. Mareile checks his blindfold, which David then puts on; looks somehow like he could look underneath it along his nose. Mareile splits the pack of cards in three parts, he shuffles them (separately) with a knife. Hand pointing to doc who is to mentally tell him the card, stab on a card – and it’s the correct one, of course. And with maaaaany mind reading babble the next – but he stabs two cards simultaneously, both wrong (what he assumes immediately), again, 2 card fall down, and the second of these is the right one. For #3, it’s faster, fortunately. For #4, it isn’t.
My suspicion is marked cards, somewhere in the pattern.
Geller maunders about invisible channels into the celebs’ minds – and praises him for how he dealt with the glitch.
Contestant 2: Nicolai Friedrich
Wants to demonstrate the power of emotional connection. Talks about photos and memories; the celebs may bring personal photos, Michaela brings hers, holding it such that he alledgedly can’t see it; Mareile sticks it into an envelope, seven more envelopes are ready, she spreads them in the audience.
Concentration and emotion drivel, he “sees” two long hair women, Michaela’s daughters. Well, the photo was visible from the audience, so an assistant might have radioed him. Or (cf. ) he as able to see it from behind, thanks to the bright light. I had hoped it would be quick, but first he lets the people in the audience tear up their empty envelopes – with breaks filled with drivel in which he pretends to read her mind, but certainly could have known from the yellow press. Sigh. He stretches it out even more. For me this makes him a better candidate to be kicked out than card glitch David.
The decision between the final two envelopes is now left to her hand feeling (which he is holding). He could press harder which she interprets accordingly. How he knew? Well, maybe a transmitter in the envelope, the direction of which he might have received with his outstretched arm.
Geller blathers of psychometry and much elegance in the preformance.
Contestant 3: Alexander Hartmann
Mentalistic melodies and a white grand piano – Alexander Hartmann promises: “I will turn thoughs into sound”.
What the heck are “mentalistic melodies”?? By the way, his hair is still long, Uri doesn’t have to donate 10000€ as offered in the last show – instead Alex tells Uri to donate independent of him cutting his hair. And offers to donate 20000€ if he wins…
Mareile may think of a song and write down the title clearly(!) – on a music stand at a fixed position where surely someone (maybe with camera) may have a peek and tell Alex about it. Then she is to think about the melodies of Yesterday, Lemon Tree and Hänschen klein. What for? Play for time? As if that was necessary, for in the tickling of the ivories and mind reader babble takes
enough too much time. Over time, this turns into My Way, what’s the correct song, of course. Well, a sometimes cheap, sometimes entertaining, and thanks to the music something different.
Geller is not impressed today – he was missing thrill and excitement. Whoops, negative words from Uri?
Alledgedly worked best in Germany, compared with other countries. Verena comes in, today not in the phone studio but on stage, and tells about 14167 people who registered online, and there were probably more not taking the effort – this is where the term “dark figure” would have fit and not for the 14167 whom Verena erroneously called “dark figure”.
E-mail, ex-smoker in studio, blah blah blah.
Geller stretches out his palm and requests the viewers to take positive energy by touching the TVs. Help, abrupt zooming into Geller’s face on each of the words achad, shtaim, shalosh (=1, 2, 3)! Geller in closeup! Unnecessary – just like the splitscreen commercial inserted in between. Grmbl.
Contestant 4: Leo Martin
How calculable human behavior can be, that’s not just his performance’s motto, but that of Uri Geller as well, it seems to me… D! may have himself compared to a mafioso – Leo unveils a jackknife, a little bottle of poison, a revolver, a tazer; Mrs May holds his eyes closed while Detlef puts the items of his choice in the places Leo names: back pocket (poison), left inner jacket pocket (knife), front right pants pocket (gun); Leo says that now the poison would be left (after ruling out the knife), in the next attempt he names the tazer. Lame. Bad whisperer assistent? Or did someone in the audience shout? There was something to hear. Could repeatedly rewind, but I don’t feel like doing that (and lack the time, too).
Russian and Italian mobsters would have taken knife and gun first, Leo says, D! took the poison – right. Thinking pattern recognized, yeah, sure. The places of the two other things are irrelevant now. Then he’s to pick up one item again: again the poison, and Leo has another poison bottle in his hand. Psychology with a little (calculated) risk?
Geller talks of “evident extrasensory powers”, “very interesting”, regrets that Martin gave up his job as profiles. Me too, somehow.
Contestant 5: Farid
Wants to recognize danger by intuition – nailgun and emergency doctor had already been presented before the commercial. Again some kind of Russian roulette – the danger may create thrill, but it’s getting boring anyway. And weren’t all previous roulette players kicked out? D! and Michaela are to swap one loaded and three unloaded nailguns while Mareile covers his eyes. Wouldn’t mind to have her hands now here on… but let’s skip that.
First gun behind his back (plays concentration while her hand rests on his shoulder), he says he’s sure and Mareile is to prove that on the back of his hand. Played uncertainty for #2. Then also this one is plugged in, test it in his elbow. In the closeup I couldn’t see if it was visible whether it’s loaded or not, or whether it’s got power at all… maybe behind the scenes there’s someone sitting at a switch? Alternatively (see ): None of the nailguns was loaded – thanks to Uri’s intervention, he didn’t have to demonstrate the loaded one anymore.
And many concentration phases. Even if Uri is already hanging of the edge of his seat: But he has to jump up (even if he pretends later that wasn’t planned), because he is to be angry about the bad example for the children out there that Farid has held the nailgun to his head instead of his chest and pulled the trigger. Well, some action but for this, anyway:
Geller then says that he’s got great potential anyway and that he hopes the audience makes the right choice…
Contestant 6: Vincent Raven
“Germany’s got its next superstar!” That was the‘s title on ProSieben.de about the raven Corax (no, that’s not the one on the picture at the side), babbles more about crap full of secrets and quotes Geller: “The telepathic connection between Vincent and Corax is unique. I have never seen such a gift.” But who’d have expected otherwise? The Dodo (see above) was well-deserved.
He wantd to manifest energy from the intermediate world. That msytic talking thing is something he can do well already… Poor Mrs May may write down a question for the otherworld, crumple it and put it into a bucket, while he croaks along with his raven.
Michaela then may ignite the paper. The raven (“Azrael”? “Hasael”?) alledgedly told him what was written on it: she asked if she’d see her deceased relatives again – he of course tells (piece by piece) that this will be the case in a bright light of joy andsoonandsoforth. Sure. Someone told him via radio. Was that the entire performace already?
Unfortunately (IN the end I have to say:) Luckily not, Mareile joins, the two may drink an “essence for the aura” – some green liquid –, amulets are also added (around the neck, not inside, of course) –, and tells a story about the little table “from a known ghost house”. Won’t reproduce that here. A mystic outfid does not make a good storyteller, that’S for sure, I think… but may be in part due to his accent. At least he jerkily moves “as if by a ghost hand” the glass and later a candle across the table – which can easily be accomplished by magnets.
Then the ladies are to “clean” the table with two cloths (slowly, soft!), another cloth then becomes red as blood – chemical reaction, I’d say, the cloths are soaked with different tinctures which become red when combined. Addendum: Or simplier (see ): the “blood” is simply pressed out of the table (remote-controlled) Guess I thought in too complicated ways for this show…
A doctor says it all happened as we saw it. Great statement. Well, I considered it too lengthy, but actually halfway entertaining. At least no total failure…
Geller talks about eerie seance and real performance.
Decision and announcement
Geller gave David Goldrake, the card trick guy, immunity. And he announces he want to make us float in the next show. A doctor is also fascinated and thinks it’s all real (or at least pretends to). As said, I hope I never need their help…
Decision with 19 minutes overtime: Leo Martin must leave.
Compared to last week, similar market share but lower absolute numbers:
Viewers aged 3+: 2,79 million, 9,2% market share (last week: 3,04/9,2%)
14-49 years: 1,94 million, 15,6% market share (last week: 2,15/15,8%)
Probably due to carnival tuesday…