Tag Archives:

water

Picture riddle 11

Let’s have a little photo quiz in between:

What is this on the photo?
Alright, it’s pretty clear that something is being reflected in the water, as is which lake this is… so the more concrete question:

What is reflected in the water?

Bilderrätsel 11

Solved by David: The yellow stripes that are reflected here prevent the boat (on the left) from being shit on by birds like the boat on the right:

Bilderrätsel 11 Lösung

Oh holy Nepomuk!

Nepomuk So they completed the construction of a small bridge (German article in Donaukurier) after nearly one year, and what do we get at the opening ceremony last week, in addition to a speech of your new mayor? “Of course” a joint Catholic–Protestant benediction of the bridge including a statue of the “bridge saint” John of Nepomuk (my translation of above newspaper link):

[…] together blessed the construction and the people who will use it, and put the bridge under the protection of Saint Nepomuk. The two clerics expressed their hope that the bridge will bring people together and that there will be no accidents.

The old bridge, then, can’t have been under the Nepomucene’s protection – or he failed at it –, since it had to be torn down due to deterioration, and since it had been rather low, it had been a problem during high-water situations.

Claus Hipp, boss of the renowned local baby food company which financed the statue crafted by Adolf Mühlbauer,1 also had his say:

Pfaffenhofen’s honorary citizen said he is thus hoping for protection by Saint Nepomuk from further floodings and also that it would still be possible in the future to “freely state one’s opinion” – for that’s what Saint Nepomuk also stands for, said the entrepreneur.

The fact that the new bridge was built noticibly higher than the old one will certainly be much more helpful against floodings than erecting an artfully sculpted block of stone. And regarding that thing about freedom of expression, the fellow must have gotten something wrong, or he’s using a very lose interpretation of confessional secret, because according to German Wikipedia, this saint is “only” concerned with:

  • Bohemia and Bavaria
  • confessors, priests, skippers, raftsmen, and millers
  • confessional secret
  • discreetness
  • against dangers from water
  • bridges

By the way, may millers whose mills are not driven by water power also feel protected by Nepomuk…?

  1. so at least no taxpayers’ money… []

Cimddyon Water™ – New energy for you!

ci Part 3 of my little satire series about mysticism and pseudoscience…
 


THE solution for everyone who wants to help body and mind reach new performance levels!

With regular application – no, not application, that sounds too much like medicine – with regular enjoyment of our cimddologically energized water, Cimddyon Water™, [… babble something that promises heaven on earth or even better]

Through the energetically enlivened submolecular hydroxidation of the trillions-of-years-old primordial water and its new loop quantum structurization, you effortlessly overcome the gravitational effects of spatial-temporal distortion! [Nobody understands that? Fine!]

  • Jump 10 meters high – guaranteed!
    [At any rate, you can still jump 50 times 20 centimeters high.]
  • Lift a car with a single hand – guaran-damn-teed!
    [Toy cars are cars, too.]
  • Perfect for sportsmen: Pure water – absolutely not detectable by doping tests!
    [We must be in the market before the Olympics!]
  • [What to do about the lazybones unathletic ones? Ah, yes:]
    You rather work with your mind than with your body? Great, our Cimddyon Water™ also gives your brain a jump start and lifts your thoughts into undreamt of heights!
  • Also suitable for alcoholics: contains no hic particles!

no image The sale will start soon at a super special rip off introductory price – less than 0.01% of a Transrapid Maglev train line per liter! And why would you need trains anyway if you can jump great distances with absolute ease?

You are interested? You have questions? Call us and let us talk you into ask us, or pre-register without obligation: [insert extremely costly phone number here]

And already under development: Cimddyon Water™ Plus – you can even fly with it! [Drink it 39 minutes before you step into the airport… the… the central station, start yourself, erm, you basically start… your flight in the central station, er, not at all, you don’t need no airstation, airport, no ch… check-in and no ten minutes, because it is obvious, errrm.]

[Don’t forget the fine print:]

The effectiveness according to scientific criteria can never not yet be proven for all many cons glossed-over idiocies alternative methods. The same applies to the silly stuff products described in this drivel advertisement.

 

Fuck, which #&%$#$ published this draft with all annotations and corrections ?!?

 


Photo © gajatz – Fotolia.com

6 million liters of water

6 million liters – how much is that, what to make of it?

  • 20,000,000 glasses (0.3 l each) full – doesn’t help much…
  • 6,000,000 liter bottles (duh)
  • 1,200,000 days for cooking and drinking in German average
  • 666,666 – 2,000,000 toilet flushes
  • 500,000 bottle crates (12 bottles each)
  • 150,000 showers
  • 50,000 bathing
  • 47,244 x average daily consumption in Germany
  • 17,000 fillings for 150cm wading pools (about 20cm depth)
  • 12,500 pallets with 4x2x5 bottle crates each
  • 8,100 € at 1.35 €/m³ (though I’m not sure about this price)
  • 1,200 dripping faucets per year
  • 129 years total consumption for an average German
  • 2,4 olympic swimming pools (50m x 25m x 2.0m or deeper)
  • 1 water-mains burst in the city of Pfaffenhofen the evening before yesterday.

 


Consumption numbers from Quarks&Co