Yearly Archives:

2009

Spam clippings

Spam? Yukk! A little collection of strange spam clippings that are not worthy of separate posts…

Mails

A typical lottery spam that was really nothing special (by the way: if they alledgedly picked one of hundreds of millions of mail addresses, why do they still use winning numbers?) – only the form of address is noteworthy:

Dear E-mail ID,

No, that’s too impersonal for me.


From one of the mails that combine a short and somewhat sexual sentence with added prose (to confuse spam filters) advertising something that you can’t clearly tell what it is:

Fiill your bed partner’s brain with the excitement and satisfaction

Somehow I thought that it’s not the bed partner’s brain that get filled, but rather other body regions…


A mail with the subject “PlaceAnd bowd his eminent top.”:

Sweet disaster with a worldOf. Lord put him tot let him. [Aside to BERTRAM] O for.

…and nothing more. An ad for dadaist art?

“Can I help you?”

(Translated from German) A “fortuneteller, miracle-healer, mystic” picks the commentators of the (German) “furtuneteller check” blog of all people to spam them with (in my case with a comment on the contact page and by mail) with above question. :lol:

Failed spam comments

In the URL field: “hi!”
Comment text: “file_links\Mmedia\(D) FILES\xrumer\full5\Projects\links.txt,35,S]”

In the URL field: “FYOLeNkRChFIAHSJmKA”
Comment text: “mypetpharmacies.txt;10;15”

In the URL field: “link”
Comment text: “What i must send to you if you need this health?,”

In the name field: “name”
In the URL field: “link”
Comment text: “Good day!,”, “Hello!,”, “Hi webmaster!”

Bush’s bad English

In the name field: “Bush” – new job for an ex-president? ;) — text (the lines with numbers were links to subdomains at a free hosting service):

sorry for my bad english
down Angeela6938
was Teera202
thing Aleberta869
that Jeneefeer5733
part Angeela714

baby sweeeeet

Yeah, really can’t call that good English…

Almost an insult

In the name field: “WP Themes” — text:

I think your blog need a new wordpress template. Downalod it from […]. The site has nice and unique wordpress templates.

Coaching without success

Finally a manual comment (German, my translation) on the search request reply post that occasionally is found when people search for a certain fortuneteller (who I wrote about in German only), written by someone (whose name I removed here) who had searched for exactly her name:

Hello to everyone who desperately search for help and contact Esmeralda [the fortuneteller].
Unfortunately 70% of all people want to make their profit from the sorrow of others. I’ve been a success
& personality coach for 11 years and have helped many people to live happier and more successful. But one thing you can believe me, not even death is for free.

Stop falling for such fraudsters and search for persons who can really help. Gladly I provide information about people who can help. Just have a look at my website (preferrably simply under [first name] [last name]) and inform yourself. And if I can help you I gladly will.
Have a good life.
[first name]

In the URL field he entered a URL conforming to the pattern www.[first name][last name].de – which doesn’t even exist! :lol: His real domain would be [last name].de only…


Photo (orig.): Justin Hall – Fotolia.com

Projekt 52 topic 4: Churches

The topic of week 4 in Sari’s photo Projekt 52:

Churches

I simply have to take a photo from my archives, since this combination isn’t available today anymore, of course:

04: Churches

Topic 04: Churches

Two months before the football world cup 2006 in Munich: The catholic Frauenkirche in the background and the football temple in the foreground – both a dead-end street…?


Links and Video of the Week (4/2009)

  • Pacman as text adventure (via Nerdcore). It looks like this:
    >w
    
    You move west.
    As you move you are eating the food pellet in your way. It tastes delicious.
    There is a shrieking noise echoing through the maze.
    
    You are in a passage leading from west to east.
    
    In the EAST you can see some delicious food 4 steps away.
    There is a crossing to the east 1 step away.
    In the WEST you can see some delicious food just 1 step away.
    There is a junction to the west 2 steps away.

    Luckily, there’s also a little map.

  • The entire new album Sepultura, A-LEX, can be played online (warning: no volume control in the online player; via biotechpunk).
  • David Letterman’s “Top 10 things I will actually miss about Bush” (via direkteingabe):

C’mon, take a toe

Ausschau haltend Just like last year: Welcome to the latest edition of “replying” to search queriesSell me your soul, And Ill bring you power!

For those who don’t know yet: These search phrases, highlighted in grey, led people here, and I neither shortened nor extended them nor made them up, I just translated the German ones.

c mon.. take a toe
What for? I got 10 toes of my own.

Verena Wriedt feet
She, too, most probably. But who’s looking at her feet?? Why?

whore shoes
Ah, that’s why. Well, who cares. But fine, just keep searching if you mean to.

stars without pantiesimages
What would stars need panties images for, anyway? Maybe because of:

I knew you were wearing women’s underwear
What, me? No. How did you get that idea?

bought my boyfriend a thong
Firstly, I’m not your boyfriend, and secondly I’d recommend you buy him a men’s thong! He’ll certainly like that better, given that he says himself:

i male like to Wear Thongs
So enjoy. There are hundreds more, you know, as my old (still open) poll shows.

fuck-questionnaire to tick
There you are (multiple selection allowed):

Fuck?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

when you marry in a mars year
…then you’re married. And you’re married one year earlier than if you wait until next year. So what?

uri geller season 3
Whoa, take it slow, season 2 just started! And given the bad ratings, I somewhat doubt there will be another season next year…

make-all-your-wishes-come-true quantum*
I wish that quantum physics will no longer be abused by wish and other mysticism crackpots – but that’s one of those wishes that’s never gonna come true, I guess.

got 1 lotto number right in each row
Had that too some time ago. You won’t win anything, though. Especially not today’s 25 million jackpot.

get lotto numbers by random
The drawing machine and the balls do that quite well each Wednesday and Saturday, I think…

25 january lotto 2009 clairvoyant
Let me do that: These numbers will be drawn:
– – – – – –
(No drawing on Sundays, you know…)

lotto numbers who were not included
…always are really sad and would prefer a “49/49” lotto.

i am a scorpian – get me 6 nos. for playing lotto
Hey, not that demanding, search engines like politeness, too! But what’s that astrology hogwash supposed to do about lotto anyway?

I WANT BELIEVE ........OH WHAT YOU KNOW
What I know you don’t have to believe; you can research everything by yourself, too.

34th day of the year mystical
What’s supposed to be mystical about February 3? There’s not even a lotto drawing!

curses and their symptoms
One symptom: You’re googling for it. Or for:

mystic-the angels attributed to the sun
And yes, that’s very mystic.

telepathy with the afterlife
(1) Telepathy doesn’t work. (2) There’s no afterlife. (3) Both combined will work even less.

naturopathy barcode
Barcodes are anything but natural.

Oooh please say it’s really happening….Please oh please dont wake me up if Im dreaming, I could stay here forever, right here…in this moment.
i like you so very much that’s why I gotta wake you up. —
That’s kinda weird, kinda weird… I think so you have your own world to fix, now don’t waste the time, it’s ends, or… perhaps now it’s already late.
Hey, may I get my word in, too?

prayers are not heard
Then your thoughts are too quiet!

Ufo Reportagen auf Germen
Germen? Where’s that?

onelaechelnforyou
Did you mean: Einsmilefürdich?

ASS THE NIGHT COMES DOWN, DARK
Even without an ass it’s getting dark as the night comes down.

I hope, she fries, I’m free If that beach dies
Beaches are quite robust, they won’t fry dead that easily. (Buffy, too, actually, and you, Spike, don’t really want her to die anyway…)

Finally again a few entries for the topic “What neither proper URLs nor proper search queries look like”:
www.do you want to get to know me.de
www doche   xex kom
www.i.without.slip.net
yor. porn. come
www. ani is at uri geller.de
www.does god know the lotto numbers.de.
www.My song .de
www.live.up.your.life.line.some.one.is.waiting.musice

Jesus, I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired. You know how tired I am? If a girl came up to me and begged me to fuck her, I couldn’t do it. That’s how tired I am.
Quite a long list today, wasn’t it? So get some sleep, bye, that’s it for this week. And remember: 400 years 400 years aaaaa – erm…


Photo: Coka – Fotolia.com

Hear Ye the Prophecies for 2012

whisper Hear ye these words spoken by Me, thy Propfet, to thou seeking knowledge, on this mystic Friday full of answers (20+12+2)×42 days before the big date which is 21 Decembre 2012 on 11:11 UTC, time of the Winter Solstice at the end of an epoch of yon notorious calendar which hath been named Maya Calendar:

  1. Indeed foolish is he who believeth that nothing will happen. ‘Tis many a thing that is going to occur: People will die, people will be born, there will be many an accident, the Earth will shake, and much much more.1
  2. Many people will start on their Christmas vacation on yon Friday before ye Christians’ special day.
  3. Certainly mysticism dreamers and cranks, the number of which will not be low, either will expect the End of the Worlde or a Rise of Consciousness, the Ascension to New Spiritual Dimensions – some alone, some in community with their likes at various festive gatherings.
  4. For consciousness, know ye, is quite a subjective matter, certainly many will at first rejoice and believe that something changed for them indeed – though when they will notice in the days to come that this was not all that great after all or that there was nothing there from the very beginning: it is then that they will rather doubt themselves, doubt their spiritual responsiveness and doubt the maturity of their souls, instead of considering how far from Reality they were lost in their abstruse reveries.
  5. This, too, will be the right time for resourceful Profit-seekers and the dreamy Believers, ye who will write more guides and almanacs for every-one who hath not been raised and who hath not ascended, just as they have written and will yet write for 2012, after nothing grandiose hath happened before in 1999/2000.
  6. And they will explain in their books that they alone know why nothing grandiose hath happened; and the number of different explanations will rival the number of those who explain.

Anyone dareth contradict??

 


See also: Questions and answers about 2012 (at Nasa)

Photo (original): scol22/sxc

  1. Like on every other day; and you can expect at leasr one earthquake of magnitude 5.0 or higher every day anyway. ↺