Welcome to the latest edition of “replying” to search queries… you nackt? Ich am not.

For those who don’t know yet: These search phrases, highlighted in grey, led people here, and I neither shortened nor extended them nor made them up, I just translated the German ones.

Let’s turn to unusual fetishes first: shopping carts without panties — now that’s not hard, just don’t buy panties in a big supermarket (and clothing shops don’t have shopping carts anyway) – and streets. street naked bottomless, of course. A street that’s been washed out underneath? Watch out, it might collapse!

Also a highly sought-after topic: men were more thongs — what, more thongs at the same time than women? Rather from the washing machine to the clothesline, guess it’s too uncomfortable on the body. But what will transsexuals like you and me do? Do they tell each other: show me your ass – translation to english — nothing to translate here, so we can get down to business right away: i find me a german girlfriend for sex in germany — now I wouldn’t mind a foreigner in Germany or a German abroad; hope that was no stupid nazi.

Like a riddle in between? Riddle – 1: You are in a square room, A window in each wall and all windows face south, a bear walks past what colour is it and where are you? (Solution below if you do not find it yourself.)

What’s the current phase of the moon, by the way? I should depilate moon calendar; and who wouldn’t like to know if full moon or new moon good for play lotto? After all you’d want lucky lotto numbers, maybe this warms YOUR HART, the light shines through my heart — come to think of it, it rather sounds like a bullet wound when light shines through a heart. And if not, turn on a lamp – your electricity meter is fuctioing, isn’t it? What’s electricity meter function without n if not “fuctio”? By the way, didn’t you notice: she photographed the electricity meter! Am I blind if you don’t see it? am i blind? can’t you see me standing here waiting in line?

Will aliens arrive on 21 december 2008? — Why should they? There won’t be any in four years either. — earth in 2012 really in dangere researchers report — real researchers won’t report anything, because such end-of-the-world prophecies are utter crap. Which doesn’t mean they can’t be combined in even crappier ways: prophecy atlantis dancer — and what’s the dancer doing? Making a ufo reportash? But tell her to take only real ufo videos (of real extraterrestrials)! Here are all links to such videos:

If that won’t work out, she can still join 11 other girls and shoot a video herself: 12 girls 1 champagne — they should just take at least a Jeroboam bottle, or else it won’t be enough for all. But don’t drink too much, otherwise something like this will be the result: SO MAkE ME LAUGh A LittLE;hELp ME gEt thROUGh. i USEd tO CRy ANd NO ONE kNEW.hELp ME OUt ANd tREAt ME RiGht.iTS bEEN A WHiLE SiNCE i’vE SMilEd tHiS BRigHt.SHOW ME tHAt NOt ALL gUyz LiE bE tHE ONE WHO kEEPs My EyES DRy

*hic* That’s it, gotta stop for today, the water calls to me and tells me to come in.

Oh, the riddle: You’re at the north pole, of course – at least if it’s currently frozen over, or it will be hard for a polar bear to walk by (which is white, of course).

Photo: Coka – Fotolia.com