“Better like 2 Girls 1 Cup”

Ain’t got no hope got no idea what to do or why i’m here… Welcome to the search requests of the first two weeks of May that led visitors here. (Search requests are highlighted in grey; I didn’t make them shorter or longer or up, I just translated the German ones.)

Better like 2 girls 1 cup! You know, 2 girls 1 cup, these girls like dynamite! — Well, firstly, it’s certainly not dynamite the girls are playing with, and secondly, no, I better won’t do anything like “2 Girls 1 Cup”. But this here is certainly better than “2 Girls 1 Cup”… (well, except for the coprohilic among the visitors, sorry, dear searchers, but maybe you take a look around anyway, e.g. via my “Best Of;) ).

By the way, I know the secret of life but i ain’t gonna tell ya – at least not for free, see Cimddology. ;)

Then show me in german! — That’s easy, you can switch languages in the top left corner…

Aint nothing but a cold beer in the sun, can you feel it coming down all over your body, can you feel it on your skin? open your eyes to touch the beautiful things in life. — Erm, what? I prefer to drink my beer and don’t pour it over my skin. Not even when the fetlock is inflamed.

Now to a incisively important question: where to wear thongs? — Well, how you like and where you like, but it will really look too strange, for instance, on the head or around the knees.

As you go through life you see there is so much that we dont understand… for example insufficient and unnecessary questions:

  • what do the contestants say in the final – well, in which final?
  • what have i done in english
  • i’m looking for a phone ad music was in the charts girl walking down road

Alright, I know not everyone’s a native speaker and makes more mistakes just because of this, and typing errors can happen anytime – but anyway, this simply cannot be the only explanation for some search requests:

  • bye appel phone
  • the versal in paris
  • womens whitout pantyes
  • girl fuck men whis a big dido – now I don’t know how tall Dido is, but I doubt that (a) she’d agree and (b) that’s a good idea anyway…
  • fuck i am working me hit fuck am am
  • nakter popo cane
  • i see you winining and crying up on the floor
  • with the ah hey dont tell nobodies
  • oh lord keep me in my write mind (or was that an author?)
  • june 2007 calendar diaper – Diaper with calendar printed on it? Calendar with diaper photo? And why 2007? heaven only knows cause i don’t understand what the answer please what’s the master plan?

Well, god brought us this far — Huh? No I didn’t; i wanna be your god, i wanna be your devil too, but ask just once and god says no. — (This dude is crazy baby dont say nothing to him.)

Bye, and remember: crying enlightens!
:heul: :bye:

Projekt 52 Week 20: Odd, strange, peculiar

The topic of week 20 in Sari’s photo Projekt 52:

Odd, strange, peculiar things

Well, what to take? Arrange something on your own? (But what?) Hope to see something really strange this week (and have the camera ready)? Or do with something less spectacular (which fits the topic in some way)?

I decided to use this:

20: Odd, strange, peculiar (1)

Week 20: Odd, strange, peculiar (1)

A few branches or beginning little trees growing on an old wall – alright, not that strange or peculiar, just a little odd, somehow unsuitable. :)


And additionally reaching into the archives, since the house on the right was recently torn down and the tree was felled even earlier:

20: Odd, strange, peculiar (2)

Week 20: Odd, strange, peculiar (2)

Apart from the fact that the snow in March two years ago wasn’t that appropriate: A tree growing on top of the roof between two houses is certainly not at the most suitable place…


Update: Another photo can be found here.

Music Quiz 14

After the lyrics smilies last week, I got a few easy(?) picture riddles (3 or 4, depending on how fast they’re solved) depicting a song or band name this week again…

1.) Which song title (from which artist) is this?

Musik-Quiz 14.1

:clap: Zuerst gelöst von Buntklicker (und 63 Sekunden später von David): Don’t Break My Heart Again von Whitesnake.

Zwischendrin schnell was ganz einfaches:

2.) Welcher Bandname ist das?

Continue Reading »

Cimddyon Water™ – New energy for you!

ci Part 3 of my little satire series about mysticism and pseudoscience…
 


THE solution for everyone who wants to help body and mind reach new performance levels!

With regular application – no, not application, that sounds too much like medicine – with regular enjoyment of our cimddologically energized water, Cimddyon Water™, [… babble something that promises heaven on earth or even better]

Through the energetically enlivened submolecular hydroxidation of the trillions-of-years-old primordial water and its new loop quantum structurization, you effortlessly overcome the gravitational effects of spatial-temporal distortion! [Nobody understands that? Fine!]

  • Jump 10 meters high – guaranteed!
    [At any rate, you can still jump 50 times 20 centimeters high.]
  • Lift a car with a single hand – guaran-damn-teed!
    [Toy cars are cars, too.]
  • Perfect for sportsmen: Pure water – absolutely not detectable by doping tests!
    [We must be in the market before the Olympics!]
  • [What to do about the lazybones unathletic ones? Ah, yes:]
    You rather work with your mind than with your body? Great, our Cimddyon Water™ also gives your brain a jump start and lifts your thoughts into undreamt of heights!
  • Also suitable for alcoholics: contains no hic particles!

no image The sale will start soon at a super special rip off introductory price – less than 0.01% of a Transrapid Maglev train line per liter! And why would you need trains anyway if you can jump great distances with absolute ease?

You are interested? You have questions? Call us and let us talk you into ask us, or pre-register without obligation: [insert extremely costly phone number here]

And already under development: Cimddyon Water™ Plus – you can even fly with it! [Drink it 39 minutes before you step into the airport… the… the central station, start yourself, erm, you basically start… your flight in the central station, er, not at all, you don’t need no airstation, airport, no ch… check-in and no ten minutes, because it is obvious, errrm.]

[Don’t forget the fine print:]

The effectiveness according to scientific criteria can never not yet be proven for all many cons glossed-over idiocies alternative methods. The same applies to the silly stuff products described in this drivel advertisement.

 

Fuck, which #&%$#$ published this draft with all annotations and corrections ?!?

 


Photo © gajatz – Fotolia.com