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spam

Qualities in Smog

NO CYC Again some automatically translated dating scam attempt – in English this time, and still funny even though only one automatic translation was involved. Two photos were also included, showing (matching the given age) not a very young skimpily dressed girl1, but a rather common (and rather flat-chested) woman in a thick jacket. Probably aimed at those who don’t fall for the young and would easier smell the fraud then…

As usual it’s probable that the photos were shot elsewhere by others – one of them shows a (park) road marking in the background (see detail above) that rather looks like “No cyc[ling]” than anything Russian.

Subject: want to meet serious intentions!

I can understand that you want to meet serious intenstions, given that your own intentions aren’t really serious. But I’m just seriously making fun of your text…

Hello, please be not surprised to mine the letter.

No, don’t worry, I’m not surprised to mine around in your “letter”. But I won’t mine it with explosives.

You in search of second half? I hope, that so. I have addressed in agency of acquaintances and to me have picked up second half. I have taken the first step to our acquaintance. I hope you not against.

No, just gimme your automatically translated first step, there won’t be a second one, and no reply from me either.

You have very much liked me, I have decided, that I can write to you.

:lol3: Oh, you decided that I liked you some time ago; and that’s what you’d write to me?

It is interesting to me to get acquainted with you, it is possible at us there is something the general.

But only very general.

I will tell about myself that you represented who to you writes not much.

Huh?

I live in Russia. I hope you heard about this country.

Russ… Russia? No, never heard about that.

To me of 37 years, I not married, am dissolved 3 years. I consider myself as the young, attractive, cheerful woman and good sense of humour.

It rather looks like “so-so” with a tired smile on the photos. And not dissolved in anything.

I search for the sincere, kind, loving and reliable man.

Won’t find these in your criminal environment, huh?

I represent its clever, interesting interlocutor, with sense of humour.

You… are a representative of a dialog partner of a thing (“its”)??

The age, a hair colour, a figure not so are important for me, as its care, character and the serious relation to marriage. I very much hope, that to a smog to find these qualities in you.

:lol2: I don’t know how thick the smog at your place is, but don’t worry, my qualities are recognizable in smog, too.

I hope, that you write to me. With excitement Elena!

No, I prefer to make fun about your mail here.

  1. a pity… []

Spam clippings

Spam? Yukk! A little collection of strange spam clippings that are not worthy of separate posts…

Mails

A typical lottery spam that was really nothing special (by the way: if they alledgedly picked one of hundreds of millions of mail addresses, why do they still use winning numbers?) – only the form of address is noteworthy:

Dear E-mail ID,

No, that’s too impersonal for me.


From one of the mails that combine a short and somewhat sexual sentence with added prose (to confuse spam filters) advertising something that you can’t clearly tell what it is:

Fiill your bed partner’s brain with the excitement and satisfaction

Somehow I thought that it’s not the bed partner’s brain that get filled, but rather other body regions…


A mail with the subject “PlaceAnd bowd his eminent top.”:

Sweet disaster with a worldOf. Lord put him tot let him. [Aside to BERTRAM] O for.

…and nothing more. An ad for dadaist art?

“Can I help you?”

(Translated from German) A “fortuneteller, miracle-healer, mystic” picks the commentators of the (German) “furtuneteller check” blog of all people to spam them with (in my case with a comment on the contact page and by mail) with above question. :lol:

Failed spam comments

In the URL field: “hi!”
Comment text: “file_links\Mmedia\(D) FILES\xrumer\full5\Projects\links.txt,35,S]”

In the URL field: “FYOLeNkRChFIAHSJmKA”
Comment text: “mypetpharmacies.txt;10;15”

In the URL field: “link”
Comment text: “What i must send to you if you need this health?,”

In the name field: “name”
In the URL field: “link”
Comment text: “Good day!,”, “Hello!,”, “Hi webmaster!”

Bush’s bad English

In the name field: “Bush” – new job for an ex-president? ;) — text (the lines with numbers were links to subdomains at a free hosting service):

sorry for my bad english
down Angeela6938
was Teera202
thing Aleberta869
that Jeneefeer5733
part Angeela714

baby sweeeeet

Yeah, really can’t call that good English…

Almost an insult

In the name field: “WP Themes” — text:

I think your blog need a new wordpress template. Downalod it from […]. The site has nice and unique wordpress templates.

Coaching without success

Finally a manual comment (German, my translation) on the search request reply post that occasionally is found when people search for a certain fortuneteller (who I wrote about in German only), written by someone (whose name I removed here) who had searched for exactly her name:

Hello to everyone who desperately search for help and contact Esmeralda [the fortuneteller].
Unfortunately 70% of all people want to make their profit from the sorrow of others. I’ve been a success
& personality coach for 11 years and have helped many people to live happier and more successful. But one thing you can believe me, not even death is for free.

Stop falling for such fraudsters and search for persons who can really help. Gladly I provide information about people who can help. Just have a look at my website (preferrably simply under [first name] [last name]) and inform yourself. And if I can help you I gladly will.
Have a good life.
[first name]

In the URL field he entered a URL conforming to the pattern www.[first name][last name].de – which doesn’t even exist! :lol: His real domain would be [last name].de only…


Photo (orig.): Justin Hall – Fotolia.com

Re: Inquiry to the Management

no handshake Some spam again – not strangely translated, it’s “only” questionable how anyone could actually be interested in an offer made this way… (originally German, I translated it).

Dear Sir or Madam,

we are a dynamic and strongly growing M&A – consultant company.

Dynamic with changing domains1 and with a mail address database you’re spammin to that’s strongly growing over the years. Did the letters in your “M&A” slip that much that the & actually is a rotated superimposition of an S on a P?

(You have to look very closely on their site to see that this “M&A” is actually supposed to mean “Mergers & Acquisitions”.)

Our core competence is the placement of companies who seek a succession plan or a share investment.

Can’t tell about placement, but finding them certainly isn’t if you’re writing to addresses harvested on personal sites like mine.

Our brokering department currently has requests from potentially interested buying parties and investors in your company and your branch of business and your reagion. We noticed your company in this connection.

I’m sure you got no idea at all what “branch of business” my “company” is in and which region this is about.

If you are planning to sell your company or seek an investor, please leave us a brief message by e-mail or phone.

No, you can read this here in public!

Do you intend to sell or are you looking for an investor?
Which price/sum of investment do you want to achieve?
Reason for your plans?
Until when do you want your plan to be completed?

money bag This certainly is the most important thing you have to know about a company… Let’s answer the questions: An investor without any voting rights with at least 10 million Euros without any refund demands, because you can always use money, and until the day after tomorrow at the latest.

Shouldn’t be hard for such competent broken, erm, brokers such as you.

Our specialists will contact you after your reply without obligation. Of course all information and data will be kept strictly secret in our house.

Oh, you got specialists? Didn’t hear from any yet.

Yours

D[…] S[…]

– Backoffice Account Management –

Does this stand for: back-room spam transmission?

If you wish no e-mails of this kind anymore, then you please write a brief e-mail to […] or reply directly to this mail.

The bold emphasis, by the way, is according how they wrote it (in German), actually. Just wondering if a reply would do more than just confirm the ail address as active…

A “disclaimer” is included too, of course (and this one in German and English):

This e-mail may contain confidential, privileged information. If you are not the intended recipient (or have received this e-mail in error) please notify the sender immediately and destroy this e-mail. Any unauthorised copying, disclosure or distribution of the material in this e-mail is strictly forbidden.

A mail that is spammed to numerous arbitrary recipients is (without error) always at the intended recipient. And I don’t think that anything unauthorized has at any time not been forbidden. But the uselessness of such disclaimers isn’t spreading fast…

See also (German): Antispam forum (with the first of their spams from June 2007).


Photos: mikecco/sxc, mikecco/sxc

  1. even it it’s just the .com version of the .biz domain that redirects to a .de domain []

Uninteresting

Another “great” offer for paid links arrived today by e-mail with the subject “An interesting Business Offer”:

Hi

Mistake 1: No personal address – so it’s likely that the sender didn’t really look at the blog.

I am webmaster of a few personal websites.

Mistake 2: Not a single one of these is given.

While looking for more related sites, I came across https://cimddwc.net/. I found your site very pleasing and would love to purchase text-links to my sites on it.

Mistake 2 repeated; mistake 3: No specification on how much the sender is offering to pay.

Please do come back on this with your views.

You get them here. If you actually happen to read it, that is.

Awaiting your response,

Liza Silva

Correct 1: A name is given, and it even matches the sender’s Google mail address.
Mistake 2 repeated again.

Conclusion: Not like this. If the sender really had related sites that also had a certain quality, he or she would not have to resort to “blind” link purchase but could instead just advertise the sites and hope that the recipient likes them so much he might even link to them of his own will. Which doesn’t mean that advertising sites by mail were recommended, since that’s just another kind of spam.

And the mandatory question begging for comments at the end: Are you receiving similar mails, too?