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spam

Links and Video of the Week (2008/39)

Everything’s German today – except the video, and that’s worth watching!

Der Shakespeare-Sketch von Hugh Laurie und Rowan Atkinson:

Nicht vergessen: info@bulk-mail.org nicht veröffentlichen! ;)

The full life story?

Peace Khalifa 2a The third part of “Peace Khalifa’s” dating and 419 scam mails, with my comments added…

Part 1: Teassting
Part 2: Hopping to hear from you

This mail included two (pretended) photos of her (see on the right and in the middle), plus two gift basket/cake/flower product images of a company offering things like that (not displayed here) and a kitschy fluffy-pet-with-roses drawing with rainging hearts (bottom of this post)…

The subject line already screams at you:

DARLING THIS IS MY FULL LIFE STORY WITH LOVE AND TRUST

It may be your longest mail, but way too short for a full life story. Well, got its advantages, too, since I don’t want to break my database with the pretended life of a scammer…

Hello dearest ,

Shouldn’t there be a name between blank and comma? You don’t take too many efforts, huh?

I am more than happy in your urgent reply to my mail.

Had you read it, you wouldn’t be happy.

How is your day? hope all is fine. Mine is a little bit hot over here in Dakar Senegal.

Yeah, smalltalk, weather, blah blah. Not uncommon for Dakar to be warm – you got nothing interesting to report?

In this camp we are only allowed to go out only on Mondays and Fridays of the weeks.Its just like one staying in the prison and i hope by Gods grace i will come out here soon.

God’s grace? Then you’ll stay there forever… or do you want me to help you?

We don’t have any relatives now whom we can go to

“We”? You are more than one scammer? Or pluralis majestatis? Haa haa haa.

all our relatives ran away in the middle of the war the only person we have now is Rev.Emmanuel George who is the pastor of the (Christ for all Churches) here in the camp

Strange kind of emphasis… and strange church name.

he has been very nice to me since i came here

Really? Even though you’re a woman? :twisted:

but i am not living with him rather i am leaving in the women’s hostel

First you write “living” correctly, than wrong…

because the camp have two hostels one for men the other for women. The Pastors Tel number is (+221_76_33_16_344) or (+221-76-841-85-92)

Can I also use +221-76-33-16-344 or +221_76_841_85_92? But gotta check first if my phone got a “_”. (Will two different men answer the phones? Is that the reason for the “we” above?)

Peace Khalifa 2b if you call and tell him that you want to speak with me he will send for me in the hostel. As a refugee here i don’t have any right or privilege to any thing be it money or whatever because it is against the law of this country.I want to go back to my studies because i only attended my first year before the tragic incident that lead to my being in this situation now took place.

Please listen to this,i have my late father’s Deposit Certificate and certificate here with me which i will send to you latter,because when he was alive he deposited some amount of money in one of the leeding bank in Europe

You mean a bank in Leeds? Or a leading bank – now which bank would that be? C’mon, do some research, you lazy criminal!

which he used my name as the next of kin,the amount in question is $3.8 million us dollars

Only? Other scammers were more generous.

So i will like you to help me transfer this money to your account and from it you can send some money for me to get my travel ling documents and air ticket to come over to meet with you.

Pshaw! Once I got your money, what’d I need you for? Oh, right, this money transfer advance-fee fraud started as a dating scam, I forgot.

I kept this secret to people in the camp here the only person that knows about it is the Rev rend because he is like a father to me.

Then watch out that he doesn’t steal it from you! How can that reverend afford two cells, huh?

So in the light of above i will like you to keep it to yourself and don’t tell it to anyone

No, don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone, as you can clearly see. ;)

for i am afraid of loosing my life and the money if people gets to know about it. Remember i am giving you all this information due to the trust i deposed on you.I like honest and understanding people,

Then you must be hating your own guts!

truthful and a man of vision,

I’m seeing clearly enough to see through you. Well, doesn’t take much, though.

truth and hardworking.

Working hard? Me? :loll:

My favourite language is English and i speak English very fluently.

I’d actually prefer if your English had more mistakes. In this mail you even didn’t include a big funny mistake such as “teassting” or “Hopping to hear from you” in the first two mails. You’re disappointing me. I guess I’ll end our relationship now.

Meanwhile i will like you to call me like i said i have alot to tell you.

Call? A cell phone for at least 13.50 cents per minute when a landline call would be only 7.80?? I’m not made of money!!!

Have a nice day and think about me.

Hard not to think about you when I’m writing about your mail, duh! But I’m almost done, and then I’m happy to forget you, bitch!

Awaiting to hear from you soonest
Yours in love,
Peace

Peace Khalifa 2e If you’re interested in the next (rather boring) mail that deals with the actual money transfer already, check 419.bittenus.com (bottom).

(Back then in April 2007, it was one different cell phone number for the “reverend”, not these two above, by the way.)

PS: If you, dear reader, happen to own the rights of these photos that the scammers used: a brief e-mail is sufficient and I’ll remove them. Or do you know the actual source?

Hopping to hear from me

Peace Khalifa The continuation of “Peace Khalifa’s” love scam mail with the strange word “teassting”, or more precisely, “her” second mail – the subject was:

HOPPING TO HEAR FROM YOU

jump - by GreenSmilies.com Video, please! Even though your bust size doesn’t seem that large, I’d really like to see you hopping in order to hear from me. Oh, is your ear clogged, and you’re trying to get it free this way?

Or do you mean the harvest of hop? You’d be at the perfect place here in the Hallertau! So hurry up, the hopping is almost done!

Hello my Dearest.
My name is Peace from Liberia in West Africa ,5.3ft tall, dark in complexion,(never married before )

Texts in parentheses often are used to give an explaination or reason for the text before. So your being unmarried is the reason for your dark skin color? Now who would have thought that…

and presently i am residing in the refugee camp here in Dakar as a result of the civil war that was fought in my country.My late father Dr Wilson Khalifa was the personal advicer to the former head of state before the rebels attacked our house one early morning and killed my mother and my father in cold .It was only me that is alive now and I managed to make my way to a near by country Senegal where i am leaving now.

And where are you going now? Or did you mean “living now”? And, well, I think it’s amazing that you managed to take your modeling photo with you – most people had rather thought about more important things.

I would like to know more about you.Your likes and dislikes,your hobbies and what you are doing presently.

A hobby that I’m also performing right now is making fun of spam and scam mails with writing and/or translation mistakes. What I don’t like: Criminals like you.

But I thing that you are not really that interested in these things, you just want money.

I will tell you more about myself in my next mail.Attached here is my picture and I will send another picture in my next mail.I will also like to see your picture.

So you can see what that moron that fell for you looks like? Do you scammers collect such photos as trophies, like some scam-baiters do with specially arranged pictures (with signs etc.)?

Hoping to hear from you soonest
yours in love
peace
rose

And, as already announced last time, there’s already the hint that one is supposed to help the “poor fugitive child” to transfer her inherited fortune out of country. But before that, there will of course be fees to pay, fees and more fees, and you’ll never see anything of the promised millions, since that’s just the way these scammers work.

And it’s not the first time that “she” is perfoming this stung, already last year “she” was active with basically the same text using the first name Sandra (though the first mail seemed to have been missing)…

PS: If you, dear reader, happen to own the rights of these photos that the scammers used: a brief e-mail is sufficient and I’ll remove them. Or do you know the actual source?

» Part 3: The full life story?

Teassting

“Testing as”? “Teas sting”? But what is stinging tea? Or does Sting want some tea? “The ass thing” (*cough*) by someone who can’t pronounce a th? “Teasing St(reet)”? Will we ever know what this word from this dating scam mail is supposed to mean?

Hello,blushrose
My name is peace.i saw your profile today at (www.clubafrika.com) and found you worthy to be mine as some one whom i can lay on his arms

Wait a sec, whose arms? Leave your pimp out of this, will you?!?

as long as love is concern, caring and teassting you all the nightlong, If you are interested in knowing more about me and for me to send you some pictures of mine, contact this:E-mail address.(peace4me_khalifa@yahoo.com) to hear from you,

Why don’t: you.(scammers) right away, erm, why don’t you scammers send the photos right away? That’d be an even better lure for all the lovesick guys stupid enough to reply to such mails.

Loving you forever
peacerosetongue(whatever)

(The smilies are from Yahoo, and of course I checked that in the mail source before I let my mail program load them. According to the header, the mail has indeed been written with Yahoo Web Mail.)

The same text, also with other names – Queen (of all things…), loveth, morrin, jane, … – and other dating sites, can be found in numerous comments all over the net, as well as that email address, by the way.

Now if you think this is a travel cost or money laundering scam with nice love letters, you’re disappointed, for already in the second mail “she” hints at this being just another advance fee fraud promising millions of dollars – but more on that in a few days…

» Continued here…

Popular soft, lowest quality

Another badly translated German spam mail – do they really hope to sell something this way??

I tried to reproduce the meaning in English here:

Popular soft for PC and Mac

…with “soft” translated like “mellow, smooth,…” and not as short form for “software”…

All Europe uses our software
ms of lowest quality at highest level.
— All programs for PC and Mac
— You can choose, the programs in the own language http://[removed].com

Lowest quality at the highest level, who wouldn’t like that? The sender was “Deutsche software.com|” (incl. vertical bar), by the way.

Or in this variant (also to be seen at “Unser täglich Spam”, German):

Hi
Sell software
Best take and the best service.
— All programs from Microsoft and Apple
— Our programs translated and adapted to the users speak French, German, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, Swedish, English.
Will the talk with you soon. http://[removed].com

Sender: “Best deutsche soft.com|”. No, will the talk with you never.

The Tonnendreher (German) got another version…