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The Seven-Anghela Itch

– Part of a series

(Again, I’ll try to make this the mockery of a scam in bad German have some sense to you English readers…)

“Excuse for that I something days not wrote.” Sure, no problem, I don’t write about you here in my blog every day, either. “From away, I want that you know that I to you very much want to meet.” You’re talking to everyone like that, huh? Well, I guess I’ll be away soon. :)

“You have told to Me that you want that our meeting has, too, happened.” I haven’t. We already know your translation program is poor, but that it invents stuff like that?

“I will be requiring me the two-sided map.” A folded map like those from Falk? Good luck trying putting that back together, you’re gonna need your recreation: “because at me Now has the holiday, that I take would was, itself begun with you to relax and to meet.”

Anghela

Good idea that you will “start to search arbitrary possibilities now just straight,” since your twisted wangling is no good idea. Also tell that your friends who are “interested that the noblesse like ours The relations will develop.”

But be careful that your “master”, whom I had suspected before, or whoever is ordering you to do all that, gets to know about it. Or why do you have to do so much? “Tell me, about as you think Our meeting, I must know your opinion.” “I ought to say that it very From Away.” “I ought to tell you that I me such trip, since it very not make possible can From Away.”

Sou you want to know a few things now:

“Your full name;???”
“Your full address;???”
— My address is as full as my name.

“The title of the airport should I fly close;???”
— The title should be at least “Prof. Dr. Dr.”, but better don’t do that flying thing, there’s enough air traffic already.

“The quantity of the mobile telephone”
— One.

“Worry, my precious thing, I send the kisses for you!” – Aaargh! Yes, I’m worried!

:loll:

(PS: If you, dear reader, happen to own the rights of these pictures the spammers used, just send me a little note and I’ll remove them.)

Show entire spam text (German) ▼

See also this German antispam forum here and especially there

And again the explicit note that this can only be frauds that want to grift pretended travel costs and/or do money-laundering.

Continued: No d8 with Anghela

Six with Anghela

– Part of a series

(Again, I’ll try to make this the mockery of a scam in bad German have some sense to you English readers…)

Yes, my dear (hopefully would-be) criminal (or are there really folks falling for this rubbish German?), I can imagine that you laugh at people – “at me is now the laugh to The person” –, but believe me, we are also laughing, and that “I want with you to say is fair.”

You cannot understand me.” Yes, that’s really hard. Und apparently much harder vice versa. And I also cannot understand why you are so cruel to that poor teddy – what has he done to you?

Anghela

“Sometimes I think, that I not will Have enough time you, to make to all, so that I want.” You got so many “friends” that you can’t keep up telling them all that you want to visit them? And the routing, then, surely is a traveling salesman kind of problem, isn’t it?

When you are done to give to me, we can in make the next step Our relations.” You mean you’ll be the only one to give, then? I like that. :teufel: But – making a sexual innuendo, hoping you’ll understand it – don’t worry, I’ve got to give you a lot.

:eyebrow:

Of course I want the fall, but me not hurry I think that you it want should.” Fall? Yes, I hope the police will bring about your downfall. Or d’you mean bungee jumping? Nah, without me, it’s too exciting. At most, I could be talked into doing a nude tandem jump with you…

“I the youth and already The girl”, “now I feel that I Finished creating the familiy, and I want it with the whole heart.” What, you already got a man and children (an older one and a girl – was that herr teddy?), and want to leave them now? “I hope that it with you alright be is.” No, it not is be! I wouldn’t have thought that of you, it’s getting worse every time!

“The swee?est kisses and the good night.” – pah! –
“Anghel”

:loll:

(PS: If you, dear reader, happen to own the rights of these pictures the spammers used, just send me a little note and I’ll remove them.)

Show entire spam text (German) ▼

See also this German antispam forum here and especially there

And again the explicit note that this can only be frauds that want to grift pretended travel costs and/or do money-laundering.

Continued: The Seven-Anghela Itch

Pretty sentences

The winners of a competition for the prettiest first sentences of German novels (“Der schönste erste Satz”), chosen by a jury among over 17000 transmittals, with my translations:

Main competition:

  1. “Ilsebill salzte nach.” (“Ilsebill added more salt.”) – Günter Grass: “Der Butt”
  2. “Als Gregor Samsa eines Morgens aus unruhigen Träumen erwachte, fand er sich in seinem Bett zu einem ungeheueren Ungeziefer verwandelt” (“When Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself in his bed turned into an enormous bug.”) – Franz Kafka: “Die Verwandlung”
  3. “Hamilkar Schaß, mein Großvater, ein Herrchen von, sagen wir mal, einundsiebzig Jahren, hatte sich gerade das Lesen beigebracht, als die Sache losging.” (“Hamilkar Schaß, my grandfather, a little man of, say, seventy-one years, has just taught himself to read, when the affair started.”) – Siegfried Lenz: “Der Leseteufel”

Child and youth literature:

  1. “In der Mottengasse elf, oben unter dem Dach hinter dem siebten Balken in dem Haus, wo der alte Eisenbahnsignalvorsteher Herr Gleisenagel wohnt, steht eine sehr geheimnisvolle Kiste.” (“In Moth Alley 11, high beneath the roof behind the seventh beam in the house of the old railroad director Mr Tracknail, there’s a very mysterious box.”) – Janosch: “Lari Fari Mogelzahn”
  2. “Es fiel Regen in jener Nacht, ein feiner, wispernder Regen.” (“Rain was falling in that night, a fine, whispering rain.”) – Cornelia Funke: “Tintenherz”
  3. “Entweder mache ich mir Sorgen oder was zu essen.” (“Either I will be worried or make something to eat.”) – Ildikó von Kürthy: “Blaue Wunder”

Anghela’s Fifth

– The tragedy’s fifth part… » Part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

(Again, I’ll try to make this the mockery of a scam in bad German have some sense to you English readers…)

“The bad news for me.” Oooh, I’m so sorry to hear that… (I admit it, that was a lie.)

“I have Lost my purse at the station, when about to, driving home.” Don’t say I didn’t warn you! “I was lucky that the [cell phone]card in me into other has layed the place.” Erm, you had the card in you, and then someone named Place put it into someone else? :roll: You’ve been kinda pervert before, I know…

“But now I feel of very one.” One what? Photo? That’s why you sent only one this time? Do you even have the rights to use a photo that has the name of the photographer and the model agency on it, Valery?

Valery (part)
(Same rags, same photo series as in the picture named “Valery.jpg” at just-models.ru.)

“Also consume I it in these days, what you have, better.” And I’m striving for consuming less electricity, water, etc. Girl, you must learn thriftiness. Maybe let Antispam-Dogbert introduce you to ascetic life (German).

“Today is in me the mood very bad and I are very tired.” Stomach upset? Or your known heart problems? Did you finally find a good doctor? “Tomorrow I hope that I will get arbitrary news.” I cross my fingers – and also help you by sending more rather arbitrary text in my mails…

So good night or good morning, whatever you mean with “it now foreign the time me, to sleep”, and despite your lies, thank you for
“The kisses Anghel”

:loll:

Show entire spam text (German) ▼

See also this German antispam forum here and there

And again the explicit note that this can only be frauds that want to grift pretended travel costs and/or do money-laundering.

Continued: Six with Anghela

Too exactly translated

sunspots Just heard in the documentary “Secrets of the Universe – The Sun” (recorded today on History Channel) in German (my re-translation):

“At the places where the sun’s magnetic field is most twisted and complex, heat rising from below is enclosed and thus cooled by up to 537 degrees [Celsius]. This creates dark spots on the sun’s surface, the so-called sunspots.”

I don’t think the American original text meant “up to 1000 degrees Fahrenheit” really accurately to a single degree.

:bigsmile:

And it’s rounded wrong, because 1000°F = 537,7°C.


PS.: Anyone got a haisplitting smiley?